Aw, crap.  I knew there was something I missed last weekend.  Yup, last weekend was the 2008 meeting of the Society for People who abuse the same Photoshop Filter in everything they do.  Correct.  SFPWATSPFIETD for short.  Ok, no.  Last weekend was the 2008 Florida Ghost Gathering, however, and it was held at the Heritage Hotel in lovely St. Petersburg.  That’s right; people who believe in ghosts and suck at Photoshop.  Where the fuck do I sign up?

OMG!!1!!  Look at that ghost that looks like a fountain!  Wait, oh; it’s actually a fountain.

I can’t tell exactly what went down at this thing, but apparently, beyond the basic roundtable stuff, there were investigations happening - serious business, as it were.  Like, I think everybody got to hang around the lobby and watch some pros try to figure out whether or not there was anything paranormal going down.  All I’m saying is for $128 a night, there better have been some kind of EVP electric laser light shit happening in there.  

Participants had to be members of “an established paranormal investigative group in Florida”, and to prove that, they needed “a website or similar proof of existence.”  Now, far be it from me to question the bullshit meters on a bunch of paranormal investigators, seriously, those tricoder things you kids have have “legit science” written all over them, but the fact that I have a Godaddy.com account and invented a Ghostbusters drinking game probably doesn’t qualify me to attend this gathering.

Anyway, I can’t remember how I even stumbled across this, but I thought I’d share.  Whoever this dude is seems to be the main local paranormal pimp, and he also seems to have an unhealthy fascination with live streaming himself talking to other paranormal enthusiasts from what looks to be the comfort of a control room with enough monitors and shit to support a NASA launch and simultaneously destabilize the economy of a small country.

To top it all off, you’ll note one of the sponsors, S.P.I.R.I.T.S. of St. Petersburg is our very own local paranormal investigative group.  If someone knows what S.P.I.R.I.T.S. stands for, let me know.  I couldn’t get past the spooky design on their Myspace page to find out.  Apparently, they’re good at what they do, since they’ve verified what everyone’s known for years, which is that my beloved Haslam’s is haunted by the product-placement obsessed ghost of Jack Kerouac.  No shit.  It’s all written up right here.  I guess the elder Jack used to roll in to Haslam’s and move his books to more prominent places in the store.  Apparently his ghost shows up every now and then to you know, rearrange shit.  If you say so, kids; you’re the ones with a website.

Lastly: Ectoplasmic residue.  It’s a bitch to get out of your clothes.