You may or may not have noticed that my favorite mocha-colored superhero and political BFF, Barack Obama is going to be speaking today at the St. Pete Times Forum. There were 20,000 official tickets available, and they are all gone. Organizers are encouraging people to still head down there, though, as they might let people in if there’s still space available around noon or so. This makes sense to me, as even if people don’t get in to see him speak, there’s something undeniable about a throng of people who might just be happy to get themselves within five miles of something awesome. There’s something unequivocally irrepressible about an aerial shot of say, a metric ass ton of people all just kicking it in support of a man and his ideas.

That being said, has anyone noticed that all the media outlets around here can focus on is how much of a GODDAMN MIND BLOWING NIGHTMARE it’s going to be in terms of traffic and parking. Jesus. We get it already. The Times seems to have the most level-headed response to the whole situation, the advice being this:

  1. Arrive early.
  2. Don’t expect a ticket to the event.
  3. Bring 20% of an umbrella.

If I were just slightly more paranoid, I’d think that some people were trying to minimize attendance by focusing mostly on the GODDAMN MIND BLOWING NIGHTMARE it’s going to be downtown. And did you notice how there was a convenient accident on the bridge this morning that shut down two lanes of traffic? Coincidence? Surely. Although I swear I saw a sign that read, “I’m Hillary Clinton, and I approve this accident.” Just sayin’.

Here’s a little something to get you in the mood:


By Lukas Ketner. Reblogged from here, who grabbed it from here.

That’s right, the man hangs with unicorns.