Is punching a kid in the throat bad?

20 Mar

Posted by Casey in the In the News department.

omfg urbn.com Oh hai! I have a mohawk, LOL!!1! I m badass outsider. OMFG, teh man is keeping me downzorz!

This kid needs me to punch him right in the throat. He’s just begging for it. I can hear him now…

Please, please Casey, punch me right in the throat. I know that I’m a total douchebag kid trying to get attention because I cut my hair in a totally original and alter-native way. And even though I totally made up the story about me being repressed, and the principal actually doesn’t give a shit about my hair, I’m still going to take a stand for my rights as a creative, free thinking individual.

Sigh. While we’re at it, let’s save a jab to the jugular for the dickface reporter who actually says that the ‘do’ can withstand 30 mph winds… what the hell is wrong with this world?

Kids, gather ’round grandpa Casey and pay attention. Just because some welding cart ’smart’ kid saw a mohawk in the latest Urban Outfitters ad and thought it’d look dope doesn’t mean he is fighting for shit. In fact, he isn’t fighting anything, he hasn’t been chosen to speak at graduation nor has he been asked to cut his hair. If anything he’d have to style it slightly differently to get a hat on his head. And for this we’ve got a news story about the plight of poor Jacob Settle? Listen Jachole, sit the fuck down and shut the fuck up. No one cares. You are an embarrassment to the people who are actually fighting the good fight of antiestablishmentism.

P.S. We now move from me posting lazy ass pictures with text on them to me posting angry rants about throat punching. You’re welcome.

6 Responses

Art.Official

March 20th, 2008 at 10:48 am

The thought of punching that little chuckle-head in throat just made my day. : )

Casey, while you’re at it.. would you kick out his (Mr. Ed) Horse teeth too?

Thanks!
Ed

March 20th, 2008 at 1:26 pm

1337 pwnage right there! TOTAL OWNZORZ! Yeah i know right having a mohawk completely means that once its shave, you gotta fight the man. Cause the mans always keeping a boy in a mohawk down. I mean he is not fighting hard enough for an average mohawk wearer. Cause i’ve seen some mohawkers on the street punching cops in the face and man, did they totally rock. Those are the true mohawk wearers.

And why would this poser speak? SO what if he’s valedictorian and at SHS, every year the valedictorian has spoken. That doesn’t mean jackkkkk shit. And the principle has absolutely NO problem with his hair except that he told him he couldn.t speak with his mohawk up in any way. That’s just plain jibberish.

I totally agree with you whole heartedly.
Your the man, I love you.
Hakuna matata.
PEAPOD

March 20th, 2008 at 4:45 pm

Dude- Did anyone see this in Timesland yesteday - its not even real - it’s a FauxHawk. This kid is the funcking Sanjiya of antiestablishmentism.

Peace!
Amy

March 20th, 2008 at 7:23 pm

C’mon, Casey… I’m sure there’s something a bit more newsworthy to post on… :(
Judester

March 21st, 2008 at 9:28 am

You can’t fight the man with a faux hawk.
S

March 27th, 2008 at 4:43 pm

Take it from the lovely Tampa Bay’s 10 News’ Melanie Brooks:
“You don’t have to look at certain way to be smart.”