According to Tampa Bay’s 10, students may be required to learn evolution. WTF?! A freakin’ theory? Dude, the bible is fact, evolution is theory. And now our kids will be forced to hear that crap? This is unbelievable.

St. Petersburg, Florida — The Florida Department of Education has drafted new science standards that for the first time require students to learn about evolution. While the concepts are currently taught, it’s addressed as “biological changes over time.”

I just assumed since we’re talking about that magical panic machine, the television news network, they were blowing up a tiny little change to make people freak out and grab their gideons. Au contraire, we’re talking about some pretty aggressive and early changes. I’m sure you don’t want to go through the actual science standard reviews, so I did for you and here’s what I learned:

2nd Grade: Recognize some organisms that lived long ago are similar to existing organisms today, but some have completely disappeared.

7th Grade: Recognize and describe that fossil evidence is consistent with the idea that human beings evolved from earlier species.

9-12th Grade: Evolution is the fundamental concept underlying all of biology and is supported by multiple forms of scientific evidence.

There are of course more details in between, but I was pretty shocked with how the last one is worded. Nice use of the word fundamental. Fundamentalism anyone? Also, this is Florida, right? I was pretty impressed to even see this stuff come up as part of the review. Granted it will of course get shot the fuck down, but this seems like a step in the right direction. Now if only we could do something about every goddamn other thing in Florida.